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Welcome to Day One of the Über Update--the biggest, most ambitious update in the history of Team Fortress 2.
We've got a lot to announce as we get closer to the update's release this Thursday, June 23rd. We've been holding one of the surprises pretty close to the vest for months now. We don't want to ruin it, but we'll give you four clues to get you guessing:
Let the speculation begin! While you're puzzling that out, why not click over to the first of our class pack announcements: Mobster Monday. To make sure everything was as accurate as possible, we went deep undercover at the most Italian place we could find, The Olive Garden. We asked the Mafia about a million questions, none of which they understood, because our mouths were full of all the free breadsticks the Mafia gives you when you visit them (they're not such bad guys).
All that hanging out with mob guys must have rubbed off on us, because we've decided to celebrate the Über Update by giving you an offer you can't (or at least shouldn't) refuse--an unprecedented WEEK-LONG FREE WEEKEND of Team Fortress 2, starting right now!
Last but not least, today's the day we reveal our all-new website. Want a link to it? Too bad--you're already there!
Hot damn! We're just minutes away from live-feeding the First Annual Saxxy Awards, and the anticipation is thick here at TF headquarters. Why? Because tonight, we are going to announce a contest winner every five minutes until someone dies! Hold on, there's somebody at the door. Keep rereading this paragraph until we get back.
Okay, we're back! Valve's lawyers said we need to make it clear that absolutely nobody is going to die as a result of these awards, and that we should erase that last paragraph. But guess what? We can't! We're live-feeding this blog post too! There's no going back! We're working without a net here. Literally anything could happen! Except for us claiming someone will die as a result of these awards, because we had to sign a pretty serious-looking stack of papers just now guaranteeing we will not mention it again.
What we can tell you is that all twenty of tonight's winners are going home with a handsome 100% Australium-plated Saxton Hale statuette, which'll look great on your virtual mantle, and even better buried waist-deep in the skull of one of your enemies, since it's also an in-game melee weapon. So technically we were right, and someone IS going to die as a result of these awards. Hold on, there's someone at the door again. While we go see who it is, why not settle in with a bowl of popcorn and click on over to the awards, which by the time you finish reading this might have already started.
AND THE WINNERS ARE:
Most Inventive Kill:
The Lime One
Created by: [LapFox] The Limie One
Best Mid-air Murder:
Spy in the Sky
Created by: Q. and Quark
Biggest Massacre:
[TF2] Saxxy Awards - Biggest Massacre
Created by: tF
Funniest Replay:
TF2 Failed Griefing
Created by: ArseGravy
Best Getaway:
The Ninja Scout. TF2 REPLAY (Finals)
Created by: Goronix
Best Revenge:
Scout Comeback
Created by: Kaedechtu
Most Pwnage:
First Annual Saxxy Awards Film (by Maso)
Created by: Maso
Most Heroic:
uberblokK -The Medic Who blocked with an uber [Saxxy Most Heroic Finalist]
Created by: .G(omez)
Best Set Design:
'What is beauty?' - Best Set Design
Created by: WilliamBoo ONEHOSTAGEEVERYHOUR
Best Team Costume:
MIGHTY MEDIC UBER RANGERS!
Created by: Clovernoodle,
Darth Z,
Hamz The Gentle Manne,
Beep,
Legion,
Fire on the Mountain and
Moby The Duck
Best Original Soundtrack:
Saxton's Six
Created by: Zoolooman, Juno and rally
Best 30 second trailer:
Heavy Endorsing Guy
Created by: EdbotnikThe
Best Coordinated Combat:
TF2 - Best Coordinated Combat - SAXXY Awards
Created by: JulianosTheGreat
Most Dramatic:
The Spying - Team Fortress 2 Saxxy Awards
Created by: OneOfThoseDays and Damone
Best Cinematography:
Saxxy Award Entry
Created by: Sauctaliens
Best Editing:
The Battle for DeGroot Keep
Created by: Heeere's Johnny
Most Epic Fail:
TF2 Replay: Most Epic Fail Finalist
Created by: rage
Most Extreme Stunt:
Reflect! Reflect! Reflect!
Created by: [RMF]RIKUSYO
Players' Choice aka Most Controversial:
Badwater D
Created by: jig
Best Overall:
El Muchacho
Created by: xlr105 -Chicken Eater-
And that's a wrap! Thanks to everybody who submitted an entry, all the people who voted, and to Rebecca Black and Rick Astley, who submitted their own work several thousand times under different names. Read the rules next time, Rick Astley. Geez.
Thanks again! We can't wait to see what you'll come up with as the TF filmmaking tools evolve.
Tune in for the First Annual Saxxy Awards Show LIVE at 3:00PM PDT this Wednesday, June 8th! We'll be revealing a new category winner every five minutes! That's one hundred frantic, furious minutes of award-bestowing! As far as we know, nobody has ever attempted to hand out this many awards in so short a time.
Starting tomorrow find twice as many items. Enjoy!
